
But this year is different. We as the Conclave are launching off into the new Decade. Away from a decade of ignorance, war, poverty, and angry wealthy urban middle class yelling at the government of taking over their lives and at the same time demanding that it fix their lazy, incompetent lives. As we sit around with our blood relatives and creepily close friends and partake in the last ceremony of perpetual gluttony of the decade, let us remind ourselves of what we have to be thankful for. And if you have nothing to be thankful for, be content that you have your dignity. And if you don't even have that, you can be thankful for your soul. And if you have lost that too (perhaps by going to China; see here) then be thankful that nature and the Omniverse have given you some kind of carbon molecular structure to allow you to exist at least as a figment of your own imagination.
So as we sit around watching a clock for 3 hours in order to celebrate one second, as each second goes by let our resolve get stronger. Brethren, let us be unstoppable in the new Decade to free the poor souls who have lost their way in the dark forest of ignorance. Let us be their evening star leading the way to a path of glowing candles that will guide them to Enlightenment. This is the gift the Conclave brings. What can you bring?